–Wayne D. Dundee  (Rainrock Reckoning)

 

Heard yuh comin’, Pard.  Coffee’s hot and strong for yuh this mornin’.  How ’bout this weather?  Remember how hot and dry it was last summer?  Whooee, then a week or so ago it was freezin’ and now the past week the rains came, and came, and came.  So Pard, I hope yuh stayed dry.  The missus and I was a-talkin’ and I said something ’bout it rainin’ cats and dogs, to which she replied it was more like elephants and hippopotamuseses.

       Pard, after yuh finish that swallow, I’ve something to tell yuh.  I’m finishin’ up my latest book and went to the publishin’ area and they’ve added a new question.  Did AI help you on the book?  I was a-wonderin’ what a steak sauce had to do with the writin’ of my book.  Then I was told that it wasn’t a steak sauce it was artificial intelligence.  Now, that didn’t help me much, ’cause I knew for sure that none of those liberal politicians helped me none, nor any of them loose-lipped folk out there that hasn’t a clue what real life is all about.  Come to find out, Pard, that this is the newest thing.  Artificial Intelligence (AI) is doin’ all sorts of things from singin’ to writin’ to influencin’ and all sorts of other things–sorta like a new-fangled type of hoo-doo.

       Good thing I made the coffee strong.  Common sense has done been done away with for the most part, and now they’re a-comin’ up with artificial sense.  Well, I guess that makes sense since none of those folks have any sense only follow whatever suits them.  I’m a-thinkin’ they live in a maze, sorta like walkin’ with Alice in the “Wonderland.”  But they think, I use that term loosely, they know it all.  They tell us they are more enlightened.  Ptui!  Seems to me they’re a gropin’ down in the mudhole.

       Go ahead, Pard, take a long drink, for what I’ve to tell yuh next will surely get yur gizzard up tight.  I was sittin’ in the doctor’s office, jist a-waitin’ for the vampire to get me to draw blood, when on that there television came the notice.  Hold on, now — the Church of England has a transgender servin’ as a bishop.  Listen, Pard, we’re livin’ in a strange, evil age, let me tell yuh.  I wanted to be sure so I looked it up and sure ‘nough.  She/he/it said, “Queer people are a blessing to the Church.  When I’m wearing my collar, it lets children know that is okay.”  The use that term “nonbinary” which means someone who does not identify exclusively as a man or a woman.  Pard, we’re livin’ in a mixed up, confused world, an’ you and I know who’s the author of confusion.

       However, let me tell yuh, I read of some common sense.  Those furries, yuh know who/what they are?  In Oklahoma if a student identifies as a furry and they’s a-causin’ a problem in school, animal control is sent for.  Now, that’s usin’ yur brain.  See, Pard, why I made the coffee so strong this mornin’?  Such goin’s on is all around us.  Yuh best be in God’s holy script more and more and be tellin’ your kids and grandkids the right way to go.  Pard, why some of these folks act more looney than you do when yuh fall on yur head ’cause yuh didn’t check yur cinch.  Be travelin’ easy and straight–the devil is out to deceive yuh.  That’s why I always sign off…”go with God.”

        Vaya con Dios.

                         –Ernest Haycox  (Grim Canyon)

 

Brrrr, Pard, the ol’ starter gets harder to start as it is, don’t need the cold a drivin’ at my bones.  I can remember some cold nights around a campfire and even colder mornin’s.  One time, over on the South Llano, we were campin’.  It got down to 19 degrees.  Now my sleepin’ bags at the time were good to around 28 degrees; needless to say, it was cold when I lumbered out of bed in the mornin’ to get the fire goin’ and the coffee started.  Shiverin’ now just thinkin’ of it.

       I see yuh made it out this mornin’.  Cold again…but I’ve got the coffee on and it’s plenty hot and strong.  Made plenty of soups this week, and a pot of chili verde the other night.  Those sure helped to keep the innards warm.  Go ‘head, drink it up, there’s plenty in the pot.  We might as well finish it all up ‘fore goin’ back out in the cold.  Hmmm, endless cycle–cold, then come in for coffee, the back out in the cold, then more coffee.  Why just the traipsin’ back and forth helps keep a body warm.

       Thinkin’ ’bout the cold brought to my mind a thought of those out there who are really sufferin’ from the cold; a cold of a different sort–coldness of the heart.  There’s cold heart among spouses, cold hearts against former friends, cold hearts with family members, but the worsest sort of cold heart is that against the Lord.  I recall that the good Lord said that because of the increase of wickedness the love of many will grow cold.  Pard, I think that’s in Matthew 24.  Aren’t we seein’ that ’round us today?  Folks could care less ’bout what the Bible says, or they want to be givin’ their own opinion of it rather than acceptin’ it as the Lord intended.  

       Pard, as that coffee warmed up yur gizzard, be sure an’ get in the Bible to keep yur soul warmed.  Might even have to stir the coals some to get the flame a-goin’, but yuh sure don’t want to let it grow cold.  Why, Pard, a cold campfire ain’t no good to no one!  A body can’t get warm, can’t get the water to boil for coffee–a cold, dead campfire is good for nothin’ but to tell someone that there used to be one there.

       Yuh, be havin’ a good Sunday tomorrow, let the flame of the Holy Spirit warm up that spirit within yuh.  Stay on the right trail, be wary of hostiles, guard the truth so be sure yur guns are loaded and ready, for the mercies’ sake Pard, check that cinch ‘fore yuh mount up.

        Vaya con Dios.

                     –Chris Bennett  (Sedition)

 

Mornin’ to yuh, Pard.  Yuh got yur longhandles on?  Sorta shake my head at the notion, but I remember when we used to ride that north country.  Why, we wore them all the time through the winter.  Don’t even own a pair anymore, but lookin’ at what the weather seers are sayin’ I might be needin’ them.  Not only that, my ol’ body thermostat don’t work so well anymore; I get cold quicker and stay that way longer.  I’ve heard of some folk havin’ ice water in their veins, but I’ll be having a spa right now.

      If’n the electricity goes out, I’ll just find another blanket.  Went and purchased a two-burner camp stove, just in case; that way I can keep the coffee on.  A couple of years ago we were without electricity for a day or so, and the kitchen and dinin’ room flooded because of the hot water heater.  Not expectin’ no troubles this time like that.  

     Pard, I had somethin’ profound to be speakin’ at yuh this mornin’, but plum forgot what it was.  That happens from time to time nowadays.  At least I remembered to get the coffee on.  Made some from a roaster called “Abeantogo.”  How ’bout that for a handle?  It was taken from that youngster who faced the fiery furnace back in ol’ ‘Nezzar’s day.  Mighty tasty coffee.  Hot coffee–sure is good on a day like today, an’ expect to be makin’ several pots over the next week.

     Yuh know, it’s one thing to sit by the fire and listen to that cold north wind a howlin’ in the trees.  It’s shore another thing to be out in it.  The chilly fingers of freezin’ temperatures will slowly strangle the warmth out of the body.  Why I remember the times I was so cold that my bones actually hurt, especially in the finger and toes.  Makes me think of all those “cold” souls out there walkin’ around when they could be warmed by the “fire” of the Holy Spirit.  There’s a reason that fire is one of His symbols for it is the Fire that brings soothin’ warmth to the cold spirit, similar to that hot cup of coffee yur a-holdin’ in yur hands. 

     Pard, stay warm as yuh can, don’t take no unnecessary trips.  Be sure and warm up yur hoss’s bridle and tighten that cinch.

     Vaya con Dios.

 

“Oh, the wayward wind is a restless wind…ohhhh,…”  Mornin’ to yuh Pard.  Man, I haven’t seen yuh since last year.  Hmmm, added a few pounds to yur girth did yuh?  Well, let me tell yuh I have diet coffee jist waitin’ for yuh.  Yep, no sugar, no honey, nothin’ sweet ‘ceptin’ my smile.  Jist the hot, strong, black brew of coffee.  Ha, fact is, I’ve never heard of “diet coffee” but who knows.

       I’ve been sittin’ here, philosophyzin’ while waitin’ for yuh to show up.  With the new year upon us, I wonder which way the wind will blow.  Most likely there’ll be some hard blasts that’ll show up this year, but mostly it’ll be a breeze rustlin’ through the tops of the trees.  Go ahead, drink that brew whilst I talk.  Yuh know that there’s plenty of folk out there jist wanderin’ like that restless wind.  They have no clue as to purpose or eternity.  They go where the wind blows them, whim by whim.  They listen to the lies of the media, graspin’ for hope that is eludin’.

       ‘Cuse me a minute while I take a swaller or two.  Ahh, got to wet the tonsils and make the innards smile.  Now, back to what I was a-sayin’, there is another wind.  A mysterious wind.   We don’t know where it comes from ‘cept from the portals of glory.  This winds moves throughout the earth, blowin’ this way and that, touchin’ whomever.  We don’t know where that wind is goin’ either, ‘cept back to the place from when it came–heaven.  Pard, we need to move along with that “wind” for it is the Holy Spirit leadin’ us.

       Now, I’m no scholar, so let me give it to yuh straight from that long ago wanderer, “The wind blows wherever it pleases.  You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is goin’.  So it is with everyone born of the Spirit.” (John 3:8, NIV).  Pard, let the wind blow yuh where He pleases this year.  Don’t yuh be tryin’ to ride against the wind, for that’s futile.  

       Yep, Pard, let that wind, blow the aroma of fresh coffee to yur nostrils, take a drink, but don’t linger if the wind is tryin’ to move yuh along.  Right now, let’s finish this pot, so’s we can get goin’ with the obligations of the day.  Pard, with those added pounds to yur girth, be sure and check that cinch for if’n yuh fall the landin’ will be a sight harder.

        Vaya con Dios.