The smell of coffee was in the air, and the pleasant room was quiet…  The pot was on the table and I filled a cup.”
              –Louis L’Amour  (Silver Canyon)

Let me have my rant, Pard, ’cause I want the room to be pleasant and we have coffee together.  Did yuh see the foolishness, well, this particular piece of foolishness that is wanting to removed history from the curriculum in the schools?  That’s all part of the plan, Pard, get rid of history, rewrite it an’ soon you’ll have a bunch of atheistic, dim-witted, dull-thinkin’ nincompoops.  Whew!  That’s out, now let’s drink our coffee.
    Ahhh, thanks for stoppin’ by Pard.  Heat ain’t got yuh shriveled up yet, has it?  Just think, the hot weather is a time for us to be thankful for what we’re goin’ to miss in eternity, and a taste to those who haven’t accepted the Lord as Savior of what’s it’s goin’ to be like.  There won’t be any cool mornin’ or evenin’ breezes.  It just don’t make sense to live in this world with all the opportunity we have and not accept the Lord!
    My mercy, we sure see the words of Paul when he said that the minds have been blinded by the god of this age.  Yep, ol’ Slewfoot, don’t want the light of the gospel to shine on folks.  Pard, that’s part of our job, to be lights a-shinin’ in the dark and evil world.   Hmmm, Pard, reckon you and me are kinda like those old smudge pots that used to be laid out to warn people away from danger.  Yuh, know, I had a cup of coffee once that tasted sorta like some of that smudge that was burnt in those pots, but that’s another story for another Perc.
    Yuh be ridin’ safe an’ don’t let the devil get yuh all riled up.  Yuh know it’s not good for yur gizzard, nor yur liver either.  Keep yur weapons close and ready an’ if yur goin’ into rough country stop an’ check yur cinch.

Over a steaming cup of freshly ground, first-rate, up-and-at-‘em juice, we got each other apprised of the present pretty quick.”
              –J. Lee Butts (Ambushed)

   What’s yuh shakin’ yur head for?  Well, I certainly agree with yuh, Pard, this world is a mess.  I just can’t figure out what’s wrong with some of the foolishness that’s happenin’ in our country except for the fact that they won’t accept the Lord.  They’re bent on their own selfish and nonsensical desires.  A good, strong cup of coffee will not solve the problem but it might happen to help yuh judge the stupidity of the situation more clearly.
    Pard, it sure works on my gizzard to be talkin’ of politics.  What has happened to good ol’ country pride?  It has been warped into somethin’ bizarre.  Yur accursed if you stand for the flag, fly it in yur yard, and sing the “Star-Spangled Banner.”  Let me fill the cups again, my gizzard is actin’ up an’ I haven’t got started yet.
    Let’s move on to somethin’ different.  Did yuh know that today is Colorado Day?  Yep, Colorado became a state back in 1876.  Talk about some hard times:  miners, cowboys, clashes with the Indians, mountain men and with statehood it became “civilized.”  It stayed that way up until the 1960s then it leaped “forward” or “progressed” as they say today because they were so much more enlightened than the rest of the country, except perhaps California.  Ha, enlightenment takes a toll, but the problem is that most don’t care or are so blind they can see the truth anymore.
    Since the gizzard is already riled, let me add one thing I saw.  Educators are beginnin’ to say that World War II shouldn’t be taught in school.  It is too intense, and they further said that the youth of today are not of the mind-set to be able to handle such intensity.  My mercy, no wonder they want everythin’ handed to them.  They cry for socialism, but they don’t realize because of their limp brains that socialism would require them to work.  The grandaddy of the “state” won’t just dole out free food.  Ahhh, take a sip–let’s get back to the coffee.
    Truth is, this coffee is delicious!  But some of those enlightened folk would make it into a “cino”.  Ruin the whole pot by doin’ that.  Listen, truth is truth an’ there’s no doubt about it.  It is not relative, it is not dependin’ upon the whims of bureaucrats or educators.  All they want to give yuh is some fake, false, or artificial.  “I am the truth…” declared Jesus.  Pard, grab hold of that in these troublesome times.
    There’s another truth yuh need to be aware of an’ I keep remindin’ yuh, always check yur cinch!

Some people say I take my coffee a little too seriously.”
              –Steven James (The Pawn)

    “Coffee in the mornin’, coffee at noontime, coffee at suppertime…” sorry, Pard, I didn’t hear yuh come up.  I was just singin’ a little ditty that I made up.  Yuh could tell?  Hmmm, but let me tell yuh, I went nigh onto twenty-eight hours without a cup.  It shore wasn’t none of my own doin’s I can tell yuh that.
    While all the world was goin’ haywire, my own personal life was somewhat topsy-turvy as well.  No coffee!  Am I too serious about my coffee, well, let me tell yuh for a fact.  NO!  I’m not one of those coffee snobs that will only drink a certain brew with a certain method.  If’n I’m at yur house and yuh offer me a cup, I’ll accept.  Well, that is unless it’s one of those cinos.  I’ve had some poor coffee in my lifetime, but I’ve found out one thing–poor coffee is better than no coffee.
    I see yuh smilin’ an’ shakin’ yur head.  Ha, that’s good.  Takes yur mind off all the insane stupidity that’s happenin’ in this country.  I’ll swan, folks have sure become unhinged in their thinkin’.  Oh, thinkin’ is puttin’ it lightly, ’cause they ain’t thinkin’ at all.  Now I could get myself started here, but don’t want to be gettin’ my gizzard all riled up at the people who are beyond stupid.  The good Lord will take care of them when the time comes.
    Listen, lest we forget Who is in charge.  Some folk out there, bureaucrats and others, think they’re high and mighty.  Some of them laugh, scorn, and scoff at the Lord.  Now, I know the Lord has an infinite amount of patience, but there is a time when His judgment and wrath will come into play.  Right now, my trust and hope is in Him.  
    I don’t want to take things lightly either, that’s another thing for shore.  I’m alert, the guns are oiled and loaded and ready for any kind of varmint, my Bible is for sure dusted off.  I’m tellin’ my kids and grandkids to be ready for the sound of that trumpet, but there’s only so much a feller can do.
    One more thing–Yeehaw!  Yippi-ki-yo-ki-yay, don’t forget that today is the National Day of the Cowboy.  It was established by President Bush in 2005 to recognize the hardworking symbol of the American West.
    So, I’ll take my cup of that elixir that I’m fond of, strap on my pistol, take my Bible and go sit on the porch.  There might even come a nice rain to cool things off.  “Oh, coffee in the mornin’, coffee in the afternoon, coffee…”
yuh git my drift, Pard?
    Ha, I see yur mountin’ up and plumb forgot to check yur cinch.  My, my yur headin’ for a fall.

He swiped the last smear of egg yolk from his plate with a piece of biscuit, popped the whole into his mouth, drained his coffee cup to wash it down.  Expelling a satisfied smile, he rocked back in his chair.”
              –Wayne D. Dundee  (Rainrock Reckoning)

Pard, come on in, yur coffee’s sittin’ there waitin’ for yuh.  Help me ponder thru this thought I’ve been ‘restlin’ with.  It’s been on my mind lately, an’ knowin’ yur intellectual prowess I reckoned yuh could help me out.  Why is it that two fried eggs can be satisfyin’ but if’n yuh scramble them yuh have to use four, or at the very minimum three?  It just don’t make no sense, but it’s a fact!  
    I’ve been worryin’ over that issue for a spell.  Better than stewin’ over some of the junk out there.  I wish I had a word to describe more than stupid!  That’s the way the folks are actin’, and they’re gloatin’ over it.  One of the leaders had the gall to be called New York’s finest a bunch of whiners.  Let me tell yuh the facts, son–if’n they’d be allowed to do their job they’d show them that the cow eats the cabbage an’ we’d see you’d be whinin’ then.  More like cryin’ in their slobbers.
    I’m tellin’ yuh, Pard, and I’m sayin’ it straight.  Yuh better be stored up with plenty of ammunition, and not just the shootin’ kind.  Yuh better have plenty of God’s Word hidden in yur heart for if somethin’ doesn’t happen, yuh might be needin’ it along with those lead dietary pills that come out from ol’ Betsy.  Listen, an’ I’ll tell yuh somethin’ else–yuh need to be preparin’ yurself for the worse come November, but always be hopin’ for the best.  Between now an’ then there’s goin’ be plenty of shenanigans happenin’, along with shady deals and accusations.
    Be checkin’ yur guns, be prayin’ in earnest, be saturated with God’s holy Word, be ready for the Lord to appear in the skies.  Now don’t be a-frettin’ none.  Worry will only agitate yur gizzard, an’ I’ve know some to break out in hives.  So don’t be frettin’, just be trustin’ in the good Lord.  Remember, He cares for you!  Oh, and be checkin’ yur cinch when yuh mount up just in cases some of those idjits come after yuh.