–Elmer Kelton  (Other Men’s Horses)

 

Come in this hyar kitchen, Pard.  Sit yurself down an’ I’ll get the coffee directly.  Go ahead, slurp on it.  Let’s get this first cup down ‘fore I unload what’s a brewin’ in my mind.  Ahhh, nothin’ like it, just makes the ol’ gizzard do flips.

     Yuh can keep sippin’ while I bring to yur attention something I saw this week.  Yuh know this ol’ world is upside down in its thinkin’ and livin’.  Sure glad there’s still plenty of good God-fearin’ folk around.  The Lord is always there, but I can feel in my bones something a-brewin’ up in the heavens.  Let me fill my cup and take a sip ‘fore I get started.

     Pard, I saw where a gay pride flag was raised over San Antonio City Hall.  Several writers were boasting that the city was declaring its support of diversity and equal and fair rights for all people.  However, in reading this, which by the way didn’t settle on my stomach so well, I didn’t see anything mentioned regarding moral purity, or God’s moral laws, or moral integrity.  There were plenty of statements beratting those who are intolerant.  I wonder, what would happen if the Christian flag was raised over City Hall?  What would be the response to that?

     Let me go on, get yurself another cup if’n yuh need it.  There’s a movement in the schools where the term “Family” is no longer to be used.  It has been determined that Family is a racist term that promotes “whiteness.”  The article further stated that the term “family” puts males in an authority position.  Duh….!  Course there could be a problem since there is one group in America where seventy-five percent of the households (I won’t use the term “home”) do not have a father.  The article indicates that it was the responsibility of teachers to help dismantle whiteness.

     “Chaos, confusion, bring it on”…is the chant of the lawless.  Can’t yuh just see ol’ Scratch a gigglin’ an’ cheerin’ them on?  John writes regarding many “antichrists,” but there will be one leader; one who will come forth in the midst of the chaos and confusion.  Pard, that day is approachin’.  Yep, there’s a great day comin’ and it may not be just bye and bye, but sooner than we think.  That’s why we have to be keepin’ our noses clean and ready for the comin’ of the Lord.  Yep, He’s a-comin’ back for His Bride, and nothin’ will be stoppin’ Him and then, oh my, the world will really see corruption, evil, and wickedness go on the rampage.

     Well, the pot’s empty, and the coffee in my cup is cold.  That’s what I get for a-preachifyin’ at yuh.  Yuh be havin’ a good week, ride straight and tall, keep yur bearin’ and be wary of yur surroundin’s, and keep yur gun and Bible handy.  Oh, an’ lest I forget, don’t be a-goin’ out without checkin’ yur cinch.  Yuh forget that and yuh might fall on yur noggin’.  That might cause yuh some confusion.

      Vaya con Dios.

                    –J.V. James  (The Oldest Trick in the Book)

 

Come in here, Pard.  Let yur tongue drool whist I pour yuh some coffee.  Don’t be a-frettin’ none, I ain’t gonna serve yuh no bad coffee.  Nosiree, I don’t believe in such a thing.  There’s plenty in life that I surely don’t understand, an’ one of them is those folk that drink bad coffee.  Fru-fru, cino stuff, that ain’t no good fer man nor beast.  Whist I’ll bet an ol’ sow would turn her nose up at some of those things folks are a-drinkin’.

     Yur lookin’ fine this mornin’, Pard.  Britches are fairly clean, boots been wiped off, yep yuh look purdee nifty.  Pard, that’s another thing I don’t be understandin’ at all.  Yuh tell me why folks think it’s somethin’ nifty to be wearin’ britches with holes in them.  I kid all the time with the younguns about that.  I offer them a couple of dollars to help towards another pair of pants, or I’ll ask how much they paid for their pants and tell them they were cheated since they have so much material missin’.

     Why Pard, back when I was a youngster, I would play on my knees until I wore a hole through my jeans.  Grandma would then put on a patch and I can remember several times of wearin’ a hole in that there patch.  She didn’t want me out with holes in my pants.  Why if’n she was livin’ today, it would save her some time and effort not to be fixin’ up my pants.  

     Pard, I jist don’t rightly understand the thinkin’ of some folks.  Yuh take them crooks, them sidewinders who sneak into this country to commit atrocities and practice their brand of wickedness.  I don’t understand why folks want to allow them to stay.  Why not send them back where’s they came from?  In fact, some of them need to be sent on down to perdition as they’re a-headin’ that way anyhows.

     Go ‘head, don’t be mindin’ me, drink that sweet nectar I made yuh.  Nothin’ wrong with it, no sireee, that’s good coffee.  I done made it my ownself.  But here’s one other thing, Pard.  Since folks are so rarin’ to have weak coffee, or holey clothes, I hope they don’t have any holes in their doctrine.  Pard, they’re’s a bunch of people spoutin’ off weak or wrong teachin’ ’bout the Lord.  We can’t afford to be goin’ out in hostile country without knowin’ what we’re believin’.  Jist like yuh can’t be ridin’ out without checkin’ yur cinch; it jist ain’t safe, nor practical, nor God-fearin’.   No, Pard, we got to have sound doctrine in our hearts, jist like yuh need strong coffee fer yur innards.

     There, Pard, I’ve said my mind.  Time for one more cup, an’ I’ll tell yuh a secret.  Later today, the missus is makin’ a pie an’ I’m already a-hankerin’ for a piece ‘long with another cup of good coffee.  Yuh be havin’ a good week, now!

        Vaya con Dios.

                    –Cotton Smith

 

     Greetin’s to yuh, Pard.  Coffee’s hot and strong, come an’ grab a cup.  Don’t yuh be bashful!  Trust yuh had a good week, no matter what though, it’s past.  Might be some consequences left over, but they’ll pass.  The thing is Pard, to face the day, and prepare for the future.  ‘Course we know that day might not show up, but we need to be ready if it does.  Same’s true ’bout the comin’ of the Lord.  It’s gonna happen, it might not be today, but we have our heart ready in case He comes tomorrow.

     Yuh know, seasons come and go, not only the seasons of nature, but of life and even in the short term.  Last night the middle granddaughter moved from the season of high school to the big adult world and the world of college.  Big change, but it is part of life.  Oh, not necessarily the college part, but the season of movin’ on with life after high school.  Boy howdy, I can remember that time.  I was ready to get on with the summer for baseball and then on to college.  I was raised right, and was ready to prove myself to the world.  It was time for me to be gettin’ on.  Long story short, I made it through–could have done better, but I made it.  Then on to the military, which I enjoyed.

     By the time I was headin’ for my Masters, I had my habits and routine down, and really enjoyed that work.  Yep, seasons come and go.  What’s that yuh say?  I’m in the season where I’m ridin’ my rockin’ chair now.  Pard, yuh best be careful or I’ll cut yur coffee rations.  Now, I’ll tell yuh the truth.  When I get up in the mornin’ to do my readin’ and studyin’ I sit in my rocker, drinkin’ coffee, lookin’ at the sun shine through the trees.  I’m not about to be thrown by that chair, but sometimes the readin’ stumps me or at least causes me to contemplate.

     Quit yur grinnin’.  But what I’m tellin’ yuh is that seasons come, and they go.  However, and get this Pard, get it good–the Lord is with us in all seasons of life, all seasons of change along the journey.  Our job is to be listenin’ to Him and obeyin’ His Word.  If’n we do that we’ll have a better time gettin’ through the obstacles on the trail and facin’ those fiery darts of the enemy.

     One thing I’ve noticed through the years of our partakin’ of coffee together.  No matter the day, the hour, or the season, I keep havin’ to reminding yuh to check yur cinch.  One of these days…   Well, we’ll leave it at that.

     Vaya con Dios.

                    –Louis L’Amour  (Radigan)

 

Howdy, Pard, glad yuh came by.  Sure, sure, the coffee’s hot and on the stove.  More of that coffee from over in New Guinea.  My it sure does satisfy the gizzard.  Pard, some things yuh just can trust.  The coffee’ll be on, if’n yuh went to my house Grandma always had the coffee on.  Funny, she didn’t drink the stuff, but she always had it in case some dignitary would show up.  Pard, it’s called Christian hospitality.  Granny, Annie’s Mom, always had soup ready for us when we came for a visit to her home.  Could depend on it, trust that it would be so.

     Pard, speaking of trust, well, it’s a wonderful thing.  I talked to ol’ Billy Basher the other day and found out why he had so many problems.  He didn’t trust no one.  What a way to go through life.  He tolt me that when he was a kid he climbed up in a tree, kinda like lit’le Zacchaeus, maybe it was a sycamore tree, but anyhow, he couldn’t get down.  He yelled and yelped and finally his Pa showed up.  He tolt young Billy to jump so that he would catch him.  Finally, after several minutes of coaxin’ Billy jumped towards his Pa’s outstretched arms.  The thing is, Pard, an’ it sorta riles me, just as Billy was goin’ to land, unscathed in those rescuin’ arms, his Pa jerked them away.  Ol’ Billy went splat, right there on the ground, groanin’ an’ a moanin’.  Didn’t break nothin, but his ol’ noggin’ took a lump.  His Pa looked down at him, pointed one of his long bony fingers and said, “Kid, that is a lesson yuh need to learn.  Don’t be trustin’ no one in this life!”

     Well, since then, ol’ Billy’s had some problems.  Imagine, goin’ through life, not even bein’ able to trust yur Dad.  Why it’s just natural for a youngster to reach out to his Mom or Dad in the midst of a terrible storm or other such ordeal.  When a perplexin’ problem comes our way, we can sure trust the Lord, that’s a solemn fact.  He won’t be pullin’ no arms away, but will catch us when we jump or if’n we fall–and that’s another solemn fact.  Pard, what would life be like if’n we couldn’t be trustin’ in the Lord?  It’s be worse that not havin’ coffee ready for yuh, an’ that’s a solemn fact.

     Pard, as we go our separate ways, yuh can be sure that the Lord will catch yuh if’n yuh forget to check yur cinch, or at least pick yuh up and doctor yuh some.  Yep, Pard, it’s good to be travelin’ through life with a Pard like the Lord there beside us–an’ that’s a solemn fact!

       Vaya con Dios.